Rape. What you can and cannot talk about… Plus a bit about Eskimos.

A lot of people in this country want to tell you what you can and cannot talk about. Sometimes they will you can talk about something but you can not joke about it, like Manny Pacquiao’s latest loss to  Juan Manuel Marquez, catastrophes or crimes like rape.

They’ll say “Rape is not funny!”, I say “Fuck you, I think it’s hilarious. How you like that?”. I can prove rape is funny. Picture Porky Pig raping Daisy Duck. See? Hey, why do you think they call him “porky”? I know what men are going to say. “Daisy was asking for it! She was coming on to Porky. She had tight feathers on. Porky got horny and he lost control!”.

A lot of men talk like that. They blame it on the woman, you know. They will always say “She had it coming! She was wearing a short skit.”. Does not seem fair to me. Does not seem right. But I believe you can joke about it!

I believe you can joke about anything. Just depends on how you construct a joke and what the exaggeration is. Every joke needs one exaggeration. Every joke needs one thing way out of proportion.

For example, have you ever seen a news story like this: “Some burglar broke into a house, stole some things and while he is in there, he raped an 81 year old woman.” and you think to yourself: “WHY?! What the fuck kind of social life this guy have? I wanna ask him why did he do that!” but I know what I will hear:

“Hey! She was coming on to me! She had a tight bathrobe on!” and I’m thinking…

“Next time, be a little more selective, will ya?”

Now, speaking of rape, but changing the topic slightly .. You know what I wonder? I wonder if there is more rape around the Northern Hemisphere or near the Equator. Per capita. I know the populations are different. I think it’s the Northern Hemisphere. Most people will think it’s the Equator because it is hot down here and people don’t wear a lot of clothing, guys can see women’s tits and they get horny and there’s a lot of raping and fucking in general.

But that’s exactly there’s less rape near the Equator. Because there is a lot of fucking in general! You can tell the countries and territories near the Equator has a lot of fucking. Look at the population figures! Billions of people live near the equator!

Near the North Pole, how many Eskimos we got? No one is getting laid there! It’s too cold!

An Eskimo says to his wife “Hey honey, how about some pussy?”, she says “Wally, are you crazy? It’s 150 below!”. Eskimo guys are deprived, they’re horny and every now and then, they got to rape somebody.

Now, the biggest problem an Eskimo rapist has is trying to get wet leather leggings off a woman who doesn’t want to take them off. Have you ever tried to pull leather off someone who is trying to kick you in your nuts? Takes a lot of effort, and in the process you’d lose your hard-on. In fact, at the North Pole, your dick will shrivel up like a stack of dimes. That’s another thing I wonder…

Does a rapist have a hard-on when he leaves the house in the morning? Or does it develop during the day while he is walking around and checking out a girl?

Just wondering.


The disease that all men have

This is the male disease. It’s called

Being Full of Shit

The male disease includes the need to be in charge at all times. In charge, in control and in command. A real man sees himself as king of the hill, leader of the pack and captain of the ship. All the while, in order to fit in and belong, he has to act like all the other men and do what they do so that they’ll be accepted, get a good job and a promotion and a wife. A wife who will be immediately get traded for a Porsche.

The poor fucks. The poor, stupid fucks.

His manliness also requires that he refuse to go to a doctor or a hospital unless it can be demonstrated to him that he has in fact been clinically dead for six months. Therefore, he must learn to ignore pain.

Most men learn this stupid shit from their fathers. Fathers teach the sons not to cry. Great stuff, huh? All the problems in the world can be traced to a father’s due to their sons. Little boys learn to hide their feelings. Society likes that so that when they get to be eighteen years of age they’ll go overseas and kill strangers without feeling anything. That part includes a certain willingness to have the balls shot off.

The poor fucks. The poor, stupid fucks.

So as a result of all these hiding of feelings, the average man’s emotional expression is the High-Five or, sometimes when deep feelings emerge, the High-Ten. This is raw emotion. That’s about they’re capable of and we have our dads to thank.

Thanks dad!

But wait! Don’t think dads can’t be fun at times too. After all, dads introduced their sons to the wonderful world of men. The really masculine, he-man stuff. No wimps, no pussies, no softies. You know what it is?

The male subcultures!

(Click on the link. Duh!)


There are five deadly male subcultures and they all overlap. 1.) The car and machinery culture, 2.) the police and military culture, 3.) the outdoors and gun culture, 4.) the sports and competition culture and 5.) the drug and alcohol culture.

Many men belong to all five. This male universe is, of course, detectable by analyzing its combustible chemical formula. Gasoline, gunpowder, alcohol and Adrenaline. Chemistry’s even more rendered lethal with the ever-present, ever-delightful accelerant, which is Testosterone. I’m talking about substance abuse. If it is chemical dependency that you’re interested in, you might want to look in Testosterone.

Testosterone. The most lethal substance on Earth and it doesn’t come from a laboratory. It comes from testicles, which is interestingly not far from the ass hole. How fitting! As it happens, all these male subcultures share a particular set of feature: Homophobia, coupled with an ironic complete child-like trust in male authority. Men are attracted to powerful men. They also share a strong fear and dislike of women and this, in spite of the pathological obsession for the pussy.

Why are men like this? I think the overriding problem for men is in life’s main event, reproduction, they’re left out. Women do all work. What do men contribute? Generally they’re just looking for a quick parking space for some sperm. A couple of hits of hot jism and the volume of the television goes right back up. It’s my belief that most of these flawed male chromosomes should not be allowed to go forward for even one more unfortunate generation. But such is Biology.

So, excluded as they are from reproduction, men must find other ways to feel useful and worthwhile. As a result, they measure themselves by the size of their guns, the size of their cars, the size of their dicks and the size of their wallets. All contests that no man can win consistently.

Let me tell you why all these happened. Women are source of all human life, that’s why. The first human being came from the belly of a female and all human fetuses begin as female. The brain itself is basically female until hormones act on it to make it structurally male.

So in reality, all men are modified females. Where do you think those nipples came from, guys? You’re an afterthought. Maybe that’s what’s bothering you. Is that what is on your mind, buddy? That would explain the hostility. Females create life, men destroy it. War, crime and violence are primarily men franchises.

Men. It’s nature’s supreme joke. Deep in the womb, men start out as the good thing and wind up as the shitty thing. Not all men. Just enough.

Just enough to fuck things up.


My motives here are not selfish or personal. I’m not saying all this stuff to get in good with women, although an occasional blowjob would be nice. But it’s not a requirement. It’s optional. BJO. Blowjob optional. 


Here’s all you need to know about men & women.

Women are crazy. Men are stupid. The main reason why women are crazy is that men are stupid. It’s not the only reason but it’s a big one.

If you don’t think men are stupid check the newspapers. Ninety-nine percent of all the truly horrifying crap going on in this world was initiated, established, perpetrated and enabled or continued by men. That includes doing “the wave” and the high-five, two of history’s truly low points.

Besides knowing that men are stupid, it’s also important to know that women are crazy. If you don’t think women are crazy I order you to ask a man. That’s the one thing men aren’t stupid about. They know for sure, way down deep in their hearts, that women are straight-out, fucking nuts.

It doesn’t just happen and it isn’t an accident. Women have good reason to be nuts. The main one being  that in the course of life, compared with men, they have far more to put up with. They bear greater responsibilities. Think of it this way: In the big cosmic cafeteria, as human beings move down the chow line of life and reach that section where shit are being spooned out, women are given several portions.

I just think it should be evident to any person who’s being honest and thinking clearly that women carry a lot more of life’s baggage than men.

To begin with, they’re smaller and weaker so they get slapped, punched, raped, abused, and beaten on a regular basis by men, of course, who are stronger. If women were stronger this would not be happening. Men would not raise a hand if they thought the balance is more equal. They’d back down quickly. Then again, if women were stronger they’d be beating the shit out of men just for the fun of it. It’s only fair.

A wedding is one of those good deals that women get. The man takes a wife, the woman is given away and everyone stands around hoping she gets pregnant immediately.

Pregnancy. Another treat for the gals. The women gain forty or so pounds, puke in the morning, walk like a duck, get sore tits and develop a nice set of hemorrhoids. What a deal! Sometimes they can’t get off the couch without someone’s assistance. Well it’s her own fault. This wouldn’t have happened if she has taken her birth control pills or used her diaphragm.

But think of how fulfilling it can be! She now has a baby! A baby she gets to practically raise alone and if she decides to be a stay-at-home mom she gets to cook, clean, sew, scrub, scour, wax, wash, dry, iron, do the shopping, drive the van and entertain the guests. She’s a house wife! An unpaid, domestic servant.

Admittedly, that description is a bit more in line with the old model. The new model is so much better. She gets a fucking job so she can be bringing something in but somehow she still ends up as an unpaid, domestic servant after she gets home from the job. You know that job, where she gets paid less than men for the same work, where she does not rise beyond a certain level in the company, where she gets harassed all day long by some oversexed moron with a lump in his pants.

Probably better if she just stays home, where she won’t get bothered by that pesky paycheck crap and there’s none of that nonsense about social security and pension plans. The only problem she’s going to delve upon is that if her ex-partner has not yet given her and their child’s monthly allowance. That is if she can still locate her ex-partner. She’d probably think sometimes that the reason why she was deserted by her ex-partner is because she’s a little bit used up, dumped her for someone who’s milk glands hadn’t sagged yet.

Can’t forget those milk glands, can we? Tits! Two tits sticking straight out of your chests! Yes women, just by the virtue of you being female you get to walk around all your life with two milk glands hanging in front of you like lanterns and if somehow you should get the idea that men don’t approve of the size and shape of those milk glands you’ll find plenty of social pressure to have those milk glands artificially enhanced. Such enhancement will be performed and supervised by men.

Here’s another physical treat for you women: Periods! Cramping, bloating and bleeding for almost a week every month. More or less fifteen percent of their monthly time! What more if you add the time that they’ve spent on PMS? Man gave it that name. If women named it, it would be called “My several days of shrieking and crying and depression just before my several days of bleeding, cramping and bloating”. Men don’t quite see it from that angle. Men experience PMS as a problem for them.

Some more special female advantages, in case you haven’t had enough: Pap Smears, Mammograms, Hysterectomy, Mastectomy, Miscarriages, Abortions, Labor Pains, Child Birth Pain, Episiotomy, Stretch Marks, Breast Feeding and Postpartum Depression. Can’t imagine why she wouldn’t feel good. Just to top it all off: Menopause!

These aren’t “good deals”, “treats” or “advantages”, by the way.

What are the exchanges for all of these? What is the woman’s pay-off? Why she gets to board the lifeboat first, at least theoretically. How often do you think that really happens? Let’s not forget that many men are willing to open the door for her. In fact some men are impressed in their willingness to do this.

I’ll tell you what a bad deal women got: They are in the majority part of this planet but they still wind up at the shitty end of the stick. One amazing thing about women is that, in spite of all the shit that they have to put up with, they live longer than men. So who do you think is tougher: Men or women? Take a guess! Remember,

Women have the otherworldly huge added burden of having to put up with men.


I do not understand why Prostitution is illegal! Why should Prostitution be illegal?

I’m talking about women who are above the legal age. Here it goes…

Selling is legal,

Fucking with permission is legal,

Why isn’t selling sex with permission legal?

So having sex for money is illegal unless you film it and sell it online?

Why should it be illegal to sell something that’s perfectly legal to give away? I can’t follow the logic on that at all! Of all the things you can do to a person, giving someone an orgasm is hardly the worst thing in the world!

In the army they give you a medal for killing so many people while civilians go to jail for giving some an orgasm!

Maybe I’m not supposed to understand certain things.

Unfathomable Stupidity II

People are fucking dumb.


You can say what you want in this country and I love this place and I love the freedoms that we used to have. I love it. I love it when it takes us a fucking catastrophe to gets us to take care for one another (*Cough* Sarcasm). I love the fact that we’re now on camera all the time.


We got some dumb ass motherfuckers floating around in this country. Obviously it doesn’t include you, the reader. You seem perceptive and intelligent enough to venture into my blog but the rest of the Philippines?  MOTHER OF ALL BLAZING SHITBALLS!

Dumber than a second coat of paint!

This isn’t just ranting and raving. The Philippines looks good back then. It was pristine! Paradise. Have you seen it lately? Have you taken a good look at it lately? It’s FUCKING EMBARRASSING. Only a nation of unenlightened half-wits could have taken this beautiful place and turn it into what it is today: A SHOPPING MALL. A big fucking shopping mall.

That’s all you got in this place. Miles and miles of malls. Major malls and mini malls. They put the mini malls in-between the major malls, and in-between mini malls they put mini marts, and in-between the mini marts you got the car lodges, gas stations, muffler shops, laundromats, cheap hotels, fast food joints, strip clubs, and dirty bookstores.

How do the people feel about all of these? Well people think it’s


They think it’s as cool as can be because Filipinos love malls. They love the malls because that’s where they get to satisfy their two most prominent addictions AT THE SAME TIME: Shopping and Eating. Millions of semi-conscious Filipinos, day after day, shuffling through the malls and they’re shopping and eating.


Speaking of eating, I noticed that the number of fat people in this country is skyrocketing. You ever noticed that? Big, fat motherfuckers are now roaming in multitudes! Huge piles of redundant protoplasm stampeding inside the malls like a fleet of Field Trip buses.

Massive bellies, monstrous thighs, and BIG FAT FUCKING ASSES! 

If you stand and look at one of them, you’ll begin to wonder how does this woman (Let’s say it’s a “she”) take a shit.

How does she shit?

Even more frightening, how does she wipe her ass?

Can she even locate her asshole?

She must require assistance! Are paramedics trained in this field?

Standing right next to her, of course, is her clueless husband who is also fat with his monstrous over sized beer belly hanging over his belt buckle. This guy ain’t seen his penis since the regime of Ferdinand Marcos.

If you stand and look at them you begin to wonder to yourself…

Do these people fuck?

Is this man actually capable of fucking this woman? 

It doesn’t seem to be possible, structurally, that this couple could achieve penetration.


Good thing I rarely go out of the house during Summer. Even better, Summer is over. If I see one of them in short shorts I’ll probably go Catholic and say “Jesus, Lord, Protector of all that is Good and Holy, deliver me from fat people in short shorts. They all got short pants, big bellies, fat thighs and dumb kids, Jesus!”.

These people are efficient, professional, compulsive consumers. They think of that as their national pride. It’s their civic duty. Consumption. It’s their new national pastime! Fuck Basketball, it’s consumption!

The only, true, lasting Filipino value that’s left is BUYING THINGS! People spending money they don’t have on things they don’t need.

If you isolated one of them, sit them down and talk to them about these issues about the low IQ’s and the dumb behavior and the bad decisions, right away they’ll start talking about education. That’s the big answer to everything. Education.

Politicians know that word and they used it on you all the time. Politicians are usually hidden in three things: The Philippine Flag, The Bible and the children.




Unfathomable Stupidity

Have you read some of my blog articles?

Yeah. Most people don’t like you to talk about those things, I know that. Some people don’t like you to mention certain things. Some people don’t want you to say this, some people don’t want you to say that, some people think that if you mention some things they might happen.


Some people are really fucking STUPID.

Did you notice that? How many stupid people do you run into during the day? Shit there’s a lot of fucking stupid people walking around. Carry a paper and a pen or pencil with you’ll wind up with thirty or forty names at the end of the day.

Look at it this way: Think of how stupid the average person is and then realize half of them are stupider than that. It won’t take you very long to spot one, does it? Takes you about eight or nine seconds.

You’ll be listening to someone and you’ll say “This guy is motherfucking STUPID!”.

Then there are some people who aren’t stupid because they’re FULL OF SHIT. That also doesn’t take very long to spot one, does it? It’ll take you about the same amount of time.

You’ll be listening to someone and you’ll say “Well, he’s fairly intelligent. Wait… HE’S FULL OF SHIT!”

Then there are some people who are not stupid & who are not full of shit. They’re FUCKING NUTS!